A Cool
Passion For Table-Tennis
Gao Jun talks
about her last eleven years.
(Chung¡¯s notes: this
article appeared in the July 2004 edition of Table Tennis World. Song Fei and Xia Wa
were the reporters.)
Gothenburg:
Sweden¡¯s number-two city. In 1993, 24-year-old Gao Jun won a difficult bronze
medal here to finish her career in the Chinese national team. She then
embarked
on a trans-Pacific bitter-sweet affair with table-tennis. As one of the
best
fast-attack pips-out penholders on the national team in the late 80¡¯s
and early
90¡¯s, she made it to the final 4 in the 42nd World
Championships
singles event. That was at the peak of the ¡°Overseas Troops¡±
phenomenon, when
on the same day, two top Chinese players Deng Yaping
and Qiao Hong lost respectively to Chinese
expatriate
players Jing Jun Hong and Jie Schoppe. In
the
semifinals, Gao
played
former Chinese national team member Chen Jing, who now represented Taipei. She could not
establish her forehand
attacks or her backhand blocks, and lost easily at 0-3. Since the 41st
Worlds women¡¯s team finals, when she lost consecutively to Koreans Hyun
Jing Hwa and Yu Sun Bok,
Gao continued to
give us the
impression that she always came up a little short. The bronze medal was
only a
couple of steps from the gold, and she finished her national team
career on a
not very satisfactory note.
I have always loved playing table-tennis. But
after the 1993
Worlds, I said I did not want to play anymore. It was not because I had
played
enough; it was because the pressure was too great. Playing became
painful, and
I stopped enjoying it; I got sick of the game. I was still young then
and in
good shape. In that Worlds, I was the only
Chinese
player to make it to the final 4. In the semifinals, I felt that I
could not make
it, and that I could not hold it up. Because everyone had lost already,
I felt
an unbearable pressure. I feel that I lost to Chen Jing not because of
my
techniques, but because of my mental state. If I had beaten her, I
would not
have been at any disadvantage playing Hyun Jing Hwa.
Why did Chen lose to Hyun? I believe it was also due to mental reasons.
She
faced Hyun before, and she won just about every time they played. At
the
finals, she felt she could win, but she lost 0-3. Of course she might
not have
faced the same amount of pressure that I did, but definitely her
thoughts were
affecting her performance and her execution.
So I stopped playing for a few years, and I
basically did
not touch my racket. Also, I developed some hormonal problems when I
got to the
US. I
could not
do a lot of exercises, because my heart would beat too fast. At that
time, my
life consisted of going to work every morning, and coming home every
evening.
Later I started playing casually. I felt great every time I played, and
I felt
that it was a lot of fun. Occasionally I would play in a tournament,
and no one
could beat me. I felt really good.
The 1999 English
Pro-Tour Open was the first time Gao
appeared on Chinese TV, wearing the USA uniform.
Her new hairstyle, and the slight
weight gain, seemed to tell everyone that this was a new Gao Jun. One thing
that had not changed was her style
and her unusual individuality. In that tournament, she made it into the
semifinals but lost to the French player Anne Boileau.
In 1997, after I became a US
citizen, the USATT kept asking me to play for them. I told them I
couldn¡¯t
really do that, and I was just having a little fun playing in the
domestic
tournaments. They said that I was winning everything even without
training, so
why not play more seriously? I thought that I used to have a goal when
I played
table-tennis in China,
but now I was simply playing for enjoyment. Without a concrete goal,
why bother?
So I said no to them. In 1999, there was a Pan-American championship,
sort of
equivalent to our Asian Games, and the USATT people asked me to play
for them
again. They said that they could never beat Canada,
but with me on the team, they would have a chance. And if I were to do
well, I
could even play in the Olympics. The US
team had always been competing against the Canadians who had Geng Lijuan on their team. No one on the US
team could beat Geng. It so happened that I beat Geng in a small
tournament
just recently, so they felt like they had a chance now. But I had not
been a US
citizen sufficiently long, therefore according to ITTF rules I needed
approval
from my former association in order to play for the US.
So the US Olympic Committee wrote a letter to the CTTA asking for
permission to
release me, and the CTTA agreed right away. Since they tried so hard, I
decided
that I would do it. And I actually beat Geng, in both teams and
singles! I
think it was 3-2 in the singles match. John Ruge
was
the one who wrote the letter to CTTA on my behalf. He did not
previously
understand the game, but he was there watching me play. He would clap
his hands
after the referee turned over the score card. Later he learned the
rules of the
game and he said ¡°It was so exciting. My palms were sweaty. I had never
seen
this kind of game before!¡±
The Sydney Olympics was
the second Olympics for Gao
Jun. At Barcelona
in 1992, Gao
and her partner
Chen Zihe were silver medalists, losing to
Deng Yaping and Qiao
Hong in the
finals. In 8 years, she had changed from a professional player to a
part-time
player. In the women¡¯s singles, Gao
advanced from group play, but lost 1-3 to Korean Ryu
Ji Hye. She
was satisfied despite
the loss, because she did not have systematic training in the US, and she
felt good winning one game from Ryu. But
how many people knew about the difficulties Gao faced on her way to Sydney?
After the Pan-American Championships, some people
who were
my competitors on the US
team felt that I was a threat to them, and jointly filed a case against
me with
the US Olympics Committee. At this time John Ruge
stood up for me, and said that I had obtained a release from the CTTA.
With the
help of many people, I won that case. I hired a famous female Chinese
lawyer in
Maryland to represent me.
She was
taking lessons from me, and she discounted the fees, but still it was
close to
$10,000 that I had to pay.
After I
won that case, she helped me apply to the
Olympics
Committee for compensation for the litigation expenses, because I was
not the
one who started the law suit. Finally I was reimbursed for all my
expenses. So
I was under some pressure then, since I felt that I would have let a
lot of
people down if I did not win in tournaments. This was a different kind
of
pressure than the ones I faced on the Chinese national team. When I
played in
the Pan-Am Championships, I did not have a world ranking. After that
tournament, I played in the US
Pro-Tour and beat Chen Jing. Chen and Geng were highly ranked, so all
of a
sudden, I was ranked in the top 20. I got an automatic qualification
for the
Olympics because I was among the top 20. So I made it to Sydney.
The CTTA agreed to let me play in the Olympics, and I feel that they
showed a
lot of class. They also did not try to prevent Chen Jing or Ni Xialian from playing in the Olympics. If they
had said no
to the ITTF, I would not have been able to play, so I want to thank
them for
their generosity. I sometimes play a little nervously; if I want to
win, I
would get nervous. But it is different than before. I used to really
want to
win and was afraid of losing. Now I just want to win, and I am not
afraid of
losing. A loss is just a loss now, it is
not a big
deal anymore.
In the beginning of
2001, Gao Jun
followed her
husband back to China, and lived in Shanghai. Soon after that she played in the 1-B league. Less than two
years
later, she and her husband went on separate ways. Because of her love
of the
game and her persevering personality, she has now found a new peaceful
space in
table-tennis and in the world.
We came back from the US
in the beginning of 2001. A sequence of unhappy events followed, and we
decided
to separate. That was at the end of 2002. When I first came back, I had
little
to do. One time I called up my old coach Tang Yinsheng,
and he said that he would find me a 1-B team to play in. I thought that
1-B was
probably about my level, and it would be good if I could do well.
Actually in
2001, the 1-B league was a very tough league; Li Xiaoxia
was playing in that league then. Besides playing in that league, I
still did
not have much to do, so coach Zhang Xielin told me to go back to school. The East
China Polytechnic
University had a
table-tennis team,
and coach Zhang spoke to coach Zang there
to arrange
a spot for me, as a student in international trade. Coach Zang was happy to have me, and this became
another turning point in my life:
I have
really adapted to going to school and playing on the school team.
If you talk about table-tennis, there is a night
and day
difference between China
and the US.
When you talk about living conditions and material aspects, of course
the US
is much better. But apart from those things, what else do I like about
the US?
There is really not that much. In China,
I can also buy a big house, or a big car, if I have the money. But if
you want
to play table-tennis, you have to come to China.
The coaches, the playing levels, and the training conditions here are
simply
beyond comparison.
When I first arrived at the university, Wu Na was
not here
yet. I roomed with Jiao Yue. We do not
have heating
in the winter or air-conditioning in the summer, and we use communal
bathrooms.
But I do not feel uncomfortable at all. First of all, I have very low
needs for
material things; a plate of fried rice would easily satisfy me. Second,
I
really miss the time I spent in the national team; I really enjoy being
part of
a community. I lead a very simple life in Shanghai.
In this cosmopolitan city, I wear very simple clothes: a T-shirt, a
pair of
jeans, and a pair of sneakers are all I need, so I do not spend much.
My
biggest expense is eating out with my teammates and classmates. They
all call
me auntie or big sister, so naturally I end up paying the bill.
When I was emotionally at the lowest point, they
helped me
pull through. Right after the divorce I was very unhappy. When I was
alone, I
felt really oppressed and always wanted to cry. But being in school
with a lot
of young people, I began to feel that life is wonderful. They helped me
step
out of the shadows. My coaches and teachers were very nice to me.
Sometimes I
did not want to practice and just wanted to sleep, and they would let
me do
that. I feel happy now. The state of mind is very important, and I feel
that I
am what the northeasterners call ¡°poor-but-happy¡±. I spend most of my
time on
the campus and seldom go out. I do not have much contact with the
table-tennis
community in Shanghai,
except with
the Butterfly representative here since I use Butterfly equipment.
In today¡¯s
loop-dominated game, the pips-out fast-attack penholder style is a
vanishing
style, but it had its bright moments. After Dai Lili,
Gao Jun, Yang
Ying and Zhang
Yingying, there is no more female player
with this
style on the national team. This once blossoming style is now a thing
of the
past, and we feel a certain amount of helplessness and sadness. Gao Jun is the lone star left, and in the 2003
Worlds and
the December 2003 World Cup, she shone brightly. In Paris, she beat the
top chopper in the world, Kim
Kyung Ah. At age 34, Gao
barely lost to Boros in the quarterfinals.
At the
last Women¡¯s World Cup in Hong Kong, she beat Wang Nan 4-2 to make it
to the final
8. In the
recently held Korean Open, she and Wosik
of Germany beat China s Olympic pair Niu
Jianfeng and Guo
Yue. In singles, she lost a close
quarter-finals match at
3-4 to eventual winner Zhang Yining. In
the following
Singapore Open, she beat Boros.
Boros¡¯ overall skills
are not as
fine as the Chinese players¡¯. She has power, but only on that one
stroke. When
she plays the short balls, you can force her into errors if you put in
a little
bit of variation. You don¡¯t see this in the Chinese players. In the
past, there
was less demand on the skills of the pips-out penholder, but now, if
you want
to play this style well, you need to meet a lot of requirements. You
have to be
smart, you need a great touch, and you have to have power as
well as
quickness. If you meet all these prerequisites, and you have a solid
game, then you can challenge
the shakehanders. In the end, both styles
need to have very
tight control. Serve receive
techniques are now better than in the past, and the overall strategies
have
changed. I feel that the pips-out penholder style is very difficult to
play well,
although I can't say that it is impossible.
When I was on the national team, I especially
hated the
¡°overseas
troops¡±. We did not want to have to prepare for the expat
players in addition to the foreign players. Losing to the foreigners
was one
thing, but losing to an expat Chinese
player, now that was
really hard to accept. But now I am one of the overseas troops. I know
how it
feels on the other side. We don¡¯t have training partners or good
coaches, and
we are more than 10 years older than the national team members. How can
we beat
them? We can¡¯t. People on the US
team asked me several times: ¡°Are you backing off when you play the
Chinese?¡±
They should try it themselves. That must have been how those expat players felt when they played us, the
national team
members. Just like when I play Wang Nan, Zhang Yining,
and Niu Jianfeng
now: if I
win one game, I feel very happy. Now and then I would win a match, and
perhaps
it is because of this attitude. Like last year at the World Cup, I was
shopping
with Jiao Zhimen before my match against
Wang Nan. It
was a 9 pm match, and I
missed the 8 pm bus because
of the shopping. My mind was
not really on that match, because I felt that there was no way I could
win. But
then, serendipitously, I did, although I could not remember how. I
only remember there was only one table in the playing hall, and I did
not
even have a coach; I felt ashamed, it was a loss of face.
At the Korean Open, I should have quickly lost to
Zhang Yining. Perhaps
2-4 at the most.
In that 6th game, I was especially lucky. I fell behind, but
then I
got an edge here and a net there, and that seemed to have messed
up her
game. She caught up, but at 10-8 I got another net, otherwise I would
have lost
in 6 games. When I played them, I feel great just winning one game. It
was
wonderful losing 3-4, regardless of how many edges and nets I got.
Wosik asked me to play
doubles
with her, and before then we had never even spoken to each other. I
agreed
because I had free time, and it did not really matter who I partnered
with
since I never expected to win. Later I found out that Li Huifun
(Hong Kong¡¯s coach) wanted me to partner Zhang Rui, but by then Wosik
already
had signed us up with the tournament committee. We made it through the
qualifying rounds, and the first match in the final draw was against Niu Jianfeng and Guo Yue. Perhaps
they never took
us seriously, but we played really well at the end of that match. I
think Niu and Guo
would rather play
some of the better pairs that they have prepared for, instead of
playing us who
looked like we were not trying hard but in fact were really trying
hard.
Actually Niu and Guo
were
very good: Niu
especially had very good control, and Guo
attacked
very strongly. But perhaps of their ages, they lacked experience, and
did not had a great grasp of their
techniques. They are always a
great threat, but in comparison Wang Nan and Zhang Yining
are a more steady pair. Assuming under equal
pressure,
no other team could beat the Chinese team.
In this small caf¨¦
next to the university, what was scheduled as a 30 minute interview
stretched
into a 90 minute one. Gao Jun¡¯s
frankness was
unexpected. Whether she was talking about pleasant things or
not-so-pleasant
things, she was straightforward and never tried to hide her feelings.
I was on the national team for about 8 years, and
the
coaches had been very nice to me. Like Zhang Xielin,
my coach Hui Jun (now Hong Kong's
head-coach), Hua Zhengde,
Xiao Xingguo, and Ceng Chuanjiang.
Sometimes there
was friction among the players, but I never minded that. When I
left the
team, I had conflicting emotions. I really loved the team, and did not
want to
leave. I still really miss it. I have not made a lot of contact with my
teammates, other than the several that were especially close to me. But
whenever we meet, we still feel that camaraderie. I have the most
contact with
Jiao Zhimin. During the Korean Open, she
asked her
husband Ahn Jae
Hyung to drive from Seoul
to pick me up. I thought I was going to be eliminated early, but I
lasted till
the quarter-finals, so he had to wait two days. In the Super League
matches I
sometimes run into Qiao Hong. She is the
league's
technical
advisor, and I also saw her in international tournaments. It was great
spending
time with her, and we often exchange short messages. I sometimes talk
to Chen Zihe on the phone; she has a son
now. Once I met Deng Yaping in Shanghai.
We had dinner together, and it was great. I also talked to Qiao
Yunping on the phone. The people in our
group are all
doing quite well, and each of us has found her own space.
To be honest, when we were in the team, there were
some
conflicts because of the competition. For example, at that time Deng Yaping really bothered me. Why was she always so
merciless
and ferocious? I was not used to her personality. The day I put away my
racket,
I immediately understood: you couldn¡¯t beat her, so you came up with
excuses.
If you can¡¯t beat someone, you are just not as good. Looking back,
people like
Deng Yaping were actually perfectly good
people.
I do not have any goals in Athens,
except to enjoy myself. To put it bluntly, and it is a little
embarrassing, I
value the Pro-Tour tournaments more, because I can make some money if I
win.
There is no money in doing well at the Olympics, and I can¡¯t win
anyway. Who
can I beat? They are so strong, and they have been training so hard. At
the
university, I have worse training conditions than overseas, let alone
the
national team. So I do not make any demands on myself.
While the national
team is furiously preparing for the Olympics in Xiamen, ex-member Gao
Jun speaks her mind so freely. After 29 years of
playing, Gao,
at 35, has no
more needs from this sport.
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